Matt Connarton Unleashed 5-3-25 hour 1

0:02 Speaker 1: This is Eleanor Langthorne from Vices Inc. And you're listening

0:05 Speaker 1: to Matt Connerton Unleashed on ninety five point three w

0:09 Speaker 1: M n H.

0:43 Speaker 2: When I was a boy, Oh, I think God, now.

0:48 Speaker 3: This one is big boy that I was. When I

0:52 Speaker 3: was a kid, I've got my face up and toilets

0:57 Speaker 3: with thesam.

1:00 Speaker 2: I wasn't always a stool movement pup, but when I was.

1:05 Speaker 4: Like, what's a jump?

1:08 Speaker 2: I didn't always look can some I used to have

1:13 Speaker 2: them go.

1:14 Speaker 5: Filled with us.

1:17 Speaker 2: I remember rode up man times and picks them along.

1:25 Speaker 5: It feels like someone that's humping their tack.

1:29 Speaker 2: Fuck all of my farm.

1:33 Speaker 6: Right, don your ness side go where no scene down?

1:38 Speaker 2: Noboby roll up live? I rhy mess side go where

1:45 Speaker 2: no scene down?

1:46 Speaker 5: The bomb me roll up live.

2:05 Speaker 2: When I was in school, didn't make good grades.

2:09 Speaker 3: I was, yes, still big numb fool. When I was

2:13 Speaker 3: still young, all I cared about proud was girls but

2:19 Speaker 3: stating and like my pmples.

2:21 Speaker 5: I used to be such just a wool before day as.

2:26 Speaker 4: Night, crying on the floor.

2:29 Speaker 2: They used to wear a fans be me of my

2:33 Speaker 2: milk money taking. When I was growing up, I remember

2:40 Speaker 2: all the bad times and picking Emma long.

2:46 Speaker 3: It feels like someone is shoving the time.

2:50 Speaker 2: My moms of my heart.

2:54 Speaker 5: I ride. Don't your nest side go?

2:57 Speaker 3: When no sat down?

2:59 Speaker 2: N you all alive? Right?

3:03 Speaker 5: Don you maside go win?

3:06 Speaker 2: No se Donna moby.

3:09 Speaker 5: Roll up live.

3:27 Speaker 3: You know when I was a boy, my father used

3:30 Speaker 3: to look down at me and say, what the hell

3:33 Speaker 3: is even?

3:34 Speaker 2: Then?

3:35 Speaker 5: Go outside and cut some grass. Why don't you go

3:39 Speaker 5: kids a girl? You stupid loser? Why dons I call.

4:19 Speaker 7: When no scene down? No bombie roll up line by?

4:24 Speaker 2: Why dons I go way? No scene down, no bobby

4:30 Speaker 2: road up?

4:31 Speaker 5: Life.

4:33 Speaker 2: You are listening to w.

4:56 Speaker 5: M and h N four.

5:01 Speaker 3: The Commander, don't get Supremelda.

5:04 Speaker 4: Maxwell coming, Welcome everybody, Here we go.

5:41 Speaker 7: It is that time again. Matt Connorton unleashed and we

5:44 Speaker 7: are live from the studios of wm NH ninety five

5:49 Speaker 7: point three FM and Glorious Manchester, New Hampshire. If you

5:52 Speaker 7: are listening live on Saturday morning, today is May third,

5:57 Speaker 7: two thy twenty five and I am not alone.

6:08 Speaker 6: Jod morning sunshine.

6:14 Speaker 7: Yes, Jenny is here of course at the news table

6:16 Speaker 7: President on account of pH and very very nice day

6:20 Speaker 7: outside is eighty today.

6:23 Speaker 6: Yeah, windows open listening berties.

6:26 Speaker 7: I noticed the sun came out after we arrived. So

6:30 Speaker 7: we have an exciting show for you today for a

6:32 Speaker 7: couple of reasons. One is, you know, we've got some

6:34 Speaker 7: great guests lined up. In just a few minutes, we're

6:37 Speaker 7: gonna be talking with our old friend Charles Richardson, host

6:40 Speaker 7: of The Charles Richardson Show, and haven't had Charles on

6:42 Speaker 7: in a long time, so that'll be a while. That'll

6:45 Speaker 7: be fun. And then in the second hour, we have

6:47 Speaker 7: the band Able Blood joining us. Able Blood we've had

6:50 Speaker 7: on several times. This might be their fourth time.

6:52 Speaker 6: I think they're almost in the five timers club.

6:55 Speaker 7: Almost, yeah, I think this. I think this is going

6:58 Speaker 7: to be their fourth time today. But such a great band,

7:00 Speaker 7: and we love featuring Abel Blood on the show. And

7:03 Speaker 7: then in the third hour today we have Etch in

7:05 Speaker 7: the Youngs and they're gonna be coming in and they're

7:08 Speaker 7: gonna play live for us in studio. We also have

7:10 Speaker 7: a couple of great studio tracks to feature from from

7:14 Speaker 7: Etch and the Youngs, but looking forward to that as

7:16 Speaker 7: well now. But circling back to as I mentioned, in

7:21 Speaker 7: just a couple of minutes, we're gonna be talking to

7:22 Speaker 7: our friend Charles Richardson. But we're making radio history today today,

7:28 Speaker 7: today is a significant moment in the history of Matt

7:32 Speaker 7: Connorton Unleash Why because this morning, your hat is straight,

7:37 Speaker 7: my hat is, Uh.

7:39 Speaker 5: I don't I'm not worried.

7:40 Speaker 7: About my happings straight right now. I just don't like

7:41 Speaker 7: when my hat's crooked in pictures. When my hat's crowing

7:45 Speaker 7: in pictures, it really bothers me. I like a nice, straight,

7:48 Speaker 7: perfectly centered hat. But no, we're making radio history on

7:55 Speaker 7: the program because for the first time, for the first

7:57 Speaker 7: time ever on Matt Connor Toon Unleashed, this we're going

8:01 Speaker 7: to be using WhatsApp to speak with a guest. Yes,

8:05 Speaker 7: and I'm glad it's someone we know, our friend Charles,

8:09 Speaker 7: because and I had known this. I knew this in

8:12 Speaker 7: the back of my mind, but I had I'd forgotten.

8:15 Speaker 5: Uh.

8:15 Speaker 7: Skype is gone. There is no more Skype. We have

8:18 Speaker 7: traditionally used Skype on the program. Now there are other options,

8:22 Speaker 7: of course, for going all the way back to the

8:26 Speaker 7: beginning of our tenure here at WM and H, we've

8:29 Speaker 7: always used Skype, you know, especially it's a It's been

8:33 Speaker 7: especially handy for guests who are on other continents who

8:36 Speaker 7: you know, it's going to cost them money to call

8:38 Speaker 7: us on the phone. So we've we've used Skype, but

8:40 Speaker 7: Skype has gone away. So but uh, everyone's using WhatsApp

8:45 Speaker 7: these days anyway. So we're going to attempt in just

8:48 Speaker 7: a moment. I am going to because you know, WhatsApp

8:51 Speaker 7: is really for your phone, but you can use it

8:54 Speaker 7: on a desktop computer. So I'm going to attempt in

8:57 Speaker 7: just a moment to call Charles. Because Charles is in Florida,

9:01 Speaker 7: he's not here with us in studio. Obviously, I'm going

9:04 Speaker 7: to attempt to call Charles via WhatsApp on this computer,

9:08 Speaker 7: the same computer on which we used to use Skype,

9:11 Speaker 7: and hopefully it works. We did test it, you and

9:15 Speaker 7: I tested it before the show and it seemed to

9:16 Speaker 7: work okay. But we will we will we will test it, yes,

9:20 Speaker 7: off air, but we will test this. We will test

9:23 Speaker 7: it with Charles.

9:24 Speaker 6: It will either be gloriously great or.

9:27 Speaker 7: It could it could be calamitous. And and if it is,

9:31 Speaker 7: if it is calamitous, that means that means we'll have

9:34 Speaker 7: to go back to the drawing board and figure something

9:36 Speaker 7: out for the future. Right now, and of course, in

9:38 Speaker 7: that case too. Charles can always just call on his

9:40 Speaker 7: cell phone. But but it's good to have an option

9:43 Speaker 7: where people don't have.

9:44 Speaker 1: To use.

9:46 Speaker 7: Yes, yeah, it would be expensive. From the other side, right, exactly,

9:49 Speaker 7: it won't cost him anything to just call on a

9:51 Speaker 7: cell phone. But but if we can talk to him

9:52 Speaker 7: on a computer, calls probably be bad quality. I'm sure

9:56 Speaker 7: there will be. I'm sure there will be, so I

9:58 Speaker 7: think we should just go ahead. Hopefully he's ready. I've

10:02 Speaker 7: got his full disclosure. I've not used WhatsApp on a desktop,

10:10 Speaker 7: so hopefully it works.

10:12 Speaker 6: Oh, this is true when you did Now when we

10:14 Speaker 6: tested it, did you try it on the desktop or

10:16 Speaker 6: did you try it on your phone.

10:18 Speaker 7: On the desktop? But I have to call Charles because

10:22 Speaker 7: what we could not figure out. And I'll look at

10:25 Speaker 7: it later and try to figure this out. But when

10:27 Speaker 7: you called me using WhatsApp, it showed up on my

10:31 Speaker 7: phone but not on the desktop, so I could not

10:34 Speaker 7: answer your call on WhatsApp on the desktop. I could

10:37 Speaker 7: only do it on my phone. But I'm calling Charles

10:41 Speaker 7: from the desktop as I called you from the desktop,

10:44 Speaker 7: and that worked, so that should work. Oh, by the way,

10:47 Speaker 7: I want to say too, hello to our friend Jay Bellow,

10:49 Speaker 7: of course, from the great band Chasing the Devil. We

10:53 Speaker 7: ran into Jay on Wednesday at Market Basket in Bedford.

10:57 Speaker 7: We were doing our grocery shopping and.

11:00 Speaker 6: Happening more frequently that we run into people grocery shopping.

11:03 Speaker 7: Yes, yes, it's fun. Yes, that is that that has

11:06 Speaker 7: become a common occurrence.

11:07 Speaker 6: We saw him there tissues.

11:10 Speaker 7: Okay, yeah, oh that's right, because I knocked over a

11:12 Speaker 7: bunch of tissues because I I I'm a klutz and

11:15 Speaker 7: I knock things over and I drop things, and I

11:17 Speaker 7: still think leads the world.

11:19 Speaker 6: And what your nose leads the world?

11:22 Speaker 7: My nose leads the world, well your world anyway, Well

11:25 Speaker 7: that's true. I use a lot of tissues because of

11:27 Speaker 7: my allergies. Yes, I had quite the sneezing fit just

11:30 Speaker 7: right before we went on the air, actually, but it

11:32 Speaker 7: was But it was wonderful to run into our friend Jay.

11:35 Speaker 7: And of course please check out Chasing the Devil. If

11:37 Speaker 7: you have not listened to Chasing the Devil, you must

11:40 Speaker 7: hear them. We always do a world radio premiere here

11:43 Speaker 7: on the program every time they have a new single,

11:45 Speaker 7: and so that was really nice to run into Jay.

11:50 Speaker 7: And I think right, So again, we're about to make

11:54 Speaker 7: radio history for the first time ever. I'm going to

11:56 Speaker 7: go ahead. I'm going to initiate the call via WhatsApp

11:59 Speaker 7: with our friend Charles Richardson, and hopefully this goes well.

12:03 Speaker 7: Hopefully the sound quality is good. We've never done this

12:06 Speaker 7: live on the air, So here we go.

12:08 Speaker 6: I feel like we need a drum roll now.

12:10 Speaker 7: And I, by the way, so I have two options.

12:12 Speaker 7: I can click video or voice. I'm going to click

12:15 Speaker 7: voice because we have no way of bringing the video

12:18 Speaker 7: of Charles into the show. So because it is a

12:22 Speaker 7: radio show after all, I mean, we are on the

12:23 Speaker 7: air of the mind. We are on video, and we

12:25 Speaker 7: stream to Facebook and YouTube and everything, but it is Yes,

12:28 Speaker 7: radio radio is theater of the mine first and foremost.

12:31 Speaker 7: So I'm going to click voice and let's oh wait, first,

12:35 Speaker 7: I better bring the volume up though on the uh.

12:39 Speaker 6: You might on that computer, the mental telepathy will work

12:43 Speaker 6: well for the audience.

12:44 Speaker 7: Yes, otherwise we won't hear anything, so oh you never know.

12:47 Speaker 7: On the board, it is still labeled Skype because I'm

12:49 Speaker 7: still using that Uh.

12:51 Speaker 6: Well that's because it changed this morning.

12:52 Speaker 7: I'm still using that computer. Yeah, we just realized this

12:55 Speaker 7: morning that we can't use Skype anymore. Okay, so Skype

12:58 Speaker 7: is gone. No one can use Skype, al ip Skype. Okay,

13:02 Speaker 7: here we go. I'm going to click voice as we

13:04 Speaker 7: sail into history, as Sean Connery says in The Hunt

13:08 Speaker 7: for Red October. Okay, let's see what happens. Oh oh,

13:12 Speaker 7: that's a good sign. I hear ringing. I hear it

13:14 Speaker 7: in my headphone, so I was, so. I assume it's

13:16 Speaker 7: going out over the air too.

13:21 Speaker 6: You are a moment early.

13:22 Speaker 7: Oh it it works, Hello, Charles, can you can you

13:29 Speaker 7: hear us?

13:30 Speaker 5: I can hear you. It didn't work on my lap

13:33 Speaker 5: on my computer. I wanted to use my studio microphone headphones,

13:37 Speaker 5: but it's like, not forget it ain't gonna work. That's

13:39 Speaker 5: all right.

13:39 Speaker 6: Interesting.

13:41 Speaker 7: See that is interesting because we had the same I

13:44 Speaker 7: gotta figure out. I gotta figure that out because we

13:46 Speaker 7: have the same issue when when we tested it before

13:49 Speaker 7: the show, when Jenny called me, I could only answer

13:53 Speaker 7: it on my phone. I could not answer it on

13:54 Speaker 7: the computer. That's interesting. Okay, that's something we're going to

14:00 Speaker 7: have to figure out. Well, at least we got to

14:02 Speaker 7: talk and you sound great.

14:05 Speaker 5: Well, thank you. I appreciate you. You sound wonderful as well.

14:09 Speaker 7: Thank you. Well, we strive for that here on the program. So,

14:14 Speaker 7: of course, Charles Richardson, host of The Charles Richardson Show,

14:16 Speaker 7: which has returned. Right, you're on what are you on now?

14:21 Speaker 7: Actually you might be changing your schedule, right, Yeah you

14:24 Speaker 7: heard huh.

14:26 Speaker 5: So normally it was well, originally when we were starting

14:30 Speaker 5: to go on, it was Monday, Wednesday, Friday. I decided

14:33 Speaker 5: to take a mental break sort of speak for a while,

14:37 Speaker 5: and then we came back to just doing Monday and

14:40 Speaker 5: Wednesdays because Friday was like an ify day anyway, we

14:43 Speaker 5: like to go to Disney and have the weekend, so

14:46 Speaker 5: Friday night usually didn't work for us. Well, now I'm

14:49 Speaker 5: having the problem with Monday because Monday just kicks my patuity.

14:55 Speaker 5: I have to use that work, I guess.

14:56 Speaker 7: Yeah, socc regulations. In fact, they prefer it that you

15:00 Speaker 7: use opportunity. It's the preferred Yes, thank you, thank you.

15:05 Speaker 5: So Monday was was was kicking it really good. And

15:08 Speaker 5: plus also Raw is on and yes show during Raw,

15:12 Speaker 5: and and how interesting it's going on right now? This

15:15 Speaker 5: is great. So with all those two factors playing in,

15:20 Speaker 5: we're trying to think of another two nights that we

15:22 Speaker 5: can do this that won't affect our schedules. And with

15:25 Speaker 5: thinking the Tuesday and Thursday rendition of the Charles Richardson Show. Okay,

15:31 Speaker 5: has not been made official yet, and I will go

15:35 Speaker 5: on record and saying this is not an official announcement.

15:38 Speaker 8: This is a preliminary announcement.

15:39 Speaker 5: It will be ratified by a unanimous vote here in

15:43 Speaker 5: the household.

15:44 Speaker 7: I see, are all votes unanimous? Or is it ever contentious?

15:49 Speaker 5: Oh? We don't have any rules here.

15:52 Speaker 7: I understand. I understand is.

15:53 Speaker 5: Mine And even if, even if, even if the vote

15:56 Speaker 5: doesn't go my way and I even vote against my

15:58 Speaker 5: own stuff, I can rather fight and just make it approve.

16:01 Speaker 7: Anyway, right, I see, Yes, I see.

16:04 Speaker 6: Can you hear me?

16:04 Speaker 7: Okay, Charles? I feel like we had a problem with

16:07 Speaker 7: this microphone last night during Paul's show. Are you hearing me? Okay?

16:11 Speaker 5: No? Yeah, you're fine. You're coming to it good, Okay.

16:14 Speaker 7: I just I just had to turn the volume way

16:16 Speaker 7: up on this Mike, Jenny, are you hearing me?

16:18 Speaker 4: Okay?

16:18 Speaker 6: Not when you turn your head.

16:20 Speaker 7: Yeah, it sounds a little. It sounds a little funny,

16:22 Speaker 7: doesn't it get rid of the well, I don't think

16:26 Speaker 7: I don't think that's the Uh well, that might help

16:28 Speaker 7: a little bit. It helps a little bit, yeah, getting

16:30 Speaker 7: rid of the filter. But yeah, we we we've been

16:32 Speaker 7: having a problem with this microphone and and Peter was

16:34 Speaker 7: in early this morning to fix it. But I think

16:37 Speaker 7: it's still uh, it's still causing an issue.

16:41 Speaker 5: Come on, Peter, get with it here. Let's go ahead

16:43 Speaker 5: and update that mic.

16:44 Speaker 7: Well the dough Yeah, well it's not it's not the mic.

16:47 Speaker 7: It's it's the processor apparently. But uh no, he came in,

16:51 Speaker 7: he came in early this morning to make sure that

16:52 Speaker 7: it was that it was working. But it's it's been

16:54 Speaker 7: a little bit. Uh, it's been a little bit funky.

16:58 Speaker 7: I might I'm gonna switch to a different mic. Actually,

17:01 Speaker 7: why don't why don't you guys can Jenny, why don't

17:04 Speaker 7: you and Charles talk for a couple of minutes. I'm

17:05 Speaker 7: just gonna switch this really really quickly. I know that Charles,

17:08 Speaker 7: you wanted to talk a bit about mental health this morning, right, Well,

17:12 Speaker 7: it was one of.

17:13 Speaker 5: The subjects that I would uh, I wouldn't mind talking

17:15 Speaker 5: about because I deal with it on a daily basis.

17:17 Speaker 5: I mean, it's yeah, it's really it's it's really tough

17:21 Speaker 5: to the point where Number one and I don't want

17:24 Speaker 5: to get too personal, but the home life isn't exactly

17:27 Speaker 5: peaches and cream. Uh, it's it's not as vanilla as

17:30 Speaker 5: people would think. Oh, they must love to be so beautifully. No,

17:33 Speaker 5: it's not. And it's not just you know me, me

17:36 Speaker 5: and the the significant other, my wife. It's uh, it's

17:40 Speaker 5: our son who's grown up and is getting more and

17:46 Speaker 5: more edgy, more and more obnoxious, really, if you want

17:50 Speaker 5: to be honest, So it is tough as a parent

17:53 Speaker 5: number one to deal with the with the kid already

17:56 Speaker 5: with ADHD and some uh uh and and some behaviors.

18:02 Speaker 5: I feel, what was this odd? Or OHDC or something

18:04 Speaker 5: like that occ you know me, But it's like a defiance.

18:09 Speaker 5: It's defiance is what is uh the diagnosis that he's got.

18:14 Speaker 5: And he's defiant to mom but to me, Oh, he

18:19 Speaker 5: doesn't dare cross me. I don't know if it's just

18:22 Speaker 5: because of my nature, if I'm speaking too deep, I

18:26 Speaker 5: speak too deep, he may listen to me more like

18:29 Speaker 5: Darth Vader or something like that. I mean, but when

18:34 Speaker 5: you're in the household like that, where there is constant arguing.

18:39 Speaker 5: And I'm not talking about domestic issues like you know,

18:42 Speaker 5: if I'm yelling at the wife or my wife's yelling

18:45 Speaker 5: at me. Now, this is just trying to control the situation.

18:48 Speaker 5: And it does get out of handle a lot of times.

18:50 Speaker 5: And I honestly, I have no room to run. I

18:55 Speaker 5: have to get out of the house. I have to

18:57 Speaker 5: get out breathed and take a back because I would

19:02 Speaker 5: go nuts, I would hurt people, and I'd probably end

19:04 Speaker 5: up in jail if I stayed in the house. It's

19:08 Speaker 5: just it comes really bad.

19:10 Speaker 7: That does sound very challenging. I'm a I'm on a

19:12 Speaker 7: different mic now and it sounds a lot better in

19:15 Speaker 7: my headphones. Yeah, yeah, much much better. Yeah, that that

19:18 Speaker 7: does sound challenging, Charles. You know, as as I think.

19:22 Speaker 7: You know, I don't have any children. Jenny and I

19:24 Speaker 7: have two cats, and that's as close to actual fatherhood

19:28 Speaker 7: as I've ever wanted to get. Well, there is there is,

19:32 Speaker 7: of course, DJ Rackless, who I suppose, I suppose that

19:36 Speaker 7: there are some paternal feeling there, but uh, but you know,

19:40 Speaker 7: but he's all grown up now too, so.

19:44 Speaker 5: But that's the thing. When they're growing up and out

19:46 Speaker 5: of the house, or even if they're in the house

19:48 Speaker 5: and growing up, it's like, listen, we don't have to

19:50 Speaker 5: stay here. You can leave and hopefully hopefully they'll be

19:55 Speaker 5: he'll be obliged to leave if that's the case. Not

20:00 Speaker 5: I did. I'm not to say that this is always

20:03 Speaker 5: that way. There is times where it's great. There's times

20:06 Speaker 5: when we have a lot of fun and we there's

20:08 Speaker 5: good times there. But it's just the point of saying

20:13 Speaker 5: no to him, which I'm sorry, we're we're gonna say no.

20:17 Speaker 8: There's nothing to it.

20:19 Speaker 5: If there's something that he did not deserve, did not earn,

20:22 Speaker 5: or or something that it's too late it's time for bed. No,

20:26 Speaker 5: he's gonna throw a fa he's gonna throw a temper tantrum,

20:29 Speaker 5: start kicking things and occasionally throwing things. Although that's that's

20:34 Speaker 5: become less of a headache, but it's it's still it's

20:38 Speaker 5: still challenging to deal with. Listen, dude, it's bedtime. You know,

20:43 Speaker 5: it's bedtime. It's been bedtime for like this for seven years.

20:46 Speaker 5: Get used to it's done, go to bed. But no,

20:51 Speaker 5: but he's he's doing he's doing this, uh that seven

20:55 Speaker 5: year tantrum that if it's bedtime. Oh oh, we're not

20:59 Speaker 5: doing this. And you know, I don't know how my

21:03 Speaker 5: parents did it when I was growing up. Maybe because

21:07 Speaker 5: I was just a good child. I was. I was

21:09 Speaker 5: a sweet little angel.

21:11 Speaker 7: Well that's the thing, you know, I was. I was

21:13 Speaker 7: a perfect angel as well growing up.

21:16 Speaker 5: And uh yeah here Jenny laugh.

21:19 Speaker 8: And I don't think that's true.

21:20 Speaker 6: Actually, I've heard stories he was actually the good kid

21:24 Speaker 6: I was.

21:24 Speaker 2: I was.

21:25 Speaker 7: I was a good kider.

21:26 Speaker 6: Like hearing his mom says something that he did that

21:29 Speaker 6: was wrong was like in my world. Really, that's it.

21:32 Speaker 6: That's just that's that's it.

21:33 Speaker 7: Huh.

21:34 Speaker 6: You might have said I don't like you.

21:38 Speaker 5: Yeah, My my word is if our son says I

21:43 Speaker 5: hate this day or I don't like you or something

21:45 Speaker 5: like that, Oh it's time out. Can you imagine what

21:48 Speaker 5: I would I would have to deal with if I

21:50 Speaker 5: told my mother I don't like you, go away leave

21:53 Speaker 5: me alone?

21:54 Speaker 1: Right.

21:56 Speaker 5: No, No, it would not be tolerated, and my bottom

22:01 Speaker 5: would hurt for a while, maybe even other parts of

22:03 Speaker 5: my body. But you know what, nothing was ever like. Oh, well,

22:07 Speaker 5: it's illegal to spank your children and it's illegal to

22:10 Speaker 5: talk bad to your children. But I'm so over this.

22:15 Speaker 5: I mean, yes, I get abusing kids is one thing,

22:19 Speaker 5: but discipline is another. I'm fully behind the corporal punishment

22:24 Speaker 5: for discipline.

22:26 Speaker 7: I've always and again, I'm not a parent, so I

22:29 Speaker 7: always feel a little weird about not having an opinion.

22:34 Speaker 7: That's not the right way to put it. But but

22:35 Speaker 7: I you know, I don't, I don't, uh, I don't

22:37 Speaker 7: make too many judgments about it. I think generally, I

22:41 Speaker 7: think it's probably something to avoid actual corporal punishment, because

22:46 Speaker 7: I think that, you know, some child psychologists and sociologists

22:51 Speaker 7: would argue that you kind of teach you run the

22:54 Speaker 7: risk of teaching your child that that the way to

22:57 Speaker 7: resolve conflict is through some form of violence. Having said that,

23:02 Speaker 7: I also do understand. I've heard parents explain and I

23:06 Speaker 7: have my own term for it. I call it the

23:07 Speaker 7: hot stove argument, where if your child is repeatedly trying

23:11 Speaker 7: to touch a hot stove and you have to tell

23:14 Speaker 7: them repeatedly to not do that, and you're not doing

23:18 Speaker 7: that to punish them or anything, you know, You're just

23:21 Speaker 7: you're doing that because you don't want them to harm themselves,

23:24 Speaker 7: because it's going to potentially burn them if they touch

23:27 Speaker 7: that hot stove. And they keep trying to do it,

23:28 Speaker 7: and so the only way to finally get them to

23:31 Speaker 7: stop is maybe a little pat on the bottom or

23:33 Speaker 7: a slap on the hand or whatever it is. I

23:35 Speaker 7: get that, and that is for their own goods. So

23:38 Speaker 7: I think it's my from my perspective again as a

23:41 Speaker 7: non parent, so I'm kind of talking out of my

23:44 Speaker 7: backside a little bit, but I think it's probably something

23:46 Speaker 7: to avoid. But I also I do understand a situation

23:50 Speaker 7: may arise where that's your best option because you're trying

23:53 Speaker 7: to keep them safe, and maybe that's the only way

23:56 Speaker 7: you can you can do it.

23:58 Speaker 8: It's not the only way to us. We go through

24:01 Speaker 8: different steps.

24:01 Speaker 5: I mean, my my wife is an ABA therapy, so

24:04 Speaker 5: she has all the knowledge in the world. We're dealing

24:07 Speaker 5: with kids that have autism and stuff like that with

24:10 Speaker 5: the same with the same respect as what my son

24:13 Speaker 5: is dealing with. Even though he's not on that spectrum yet,

24:16 Speaker 5: he's very close. He was tested, he was tested early,

24:19 Speaker 5: so we're probably thinking the test him again. It's been recommended.

24:23 Speaker 5: But she has all these techniques. We have, you know,

24:27 Speaker 5: rewards charts, we have this and that. But yet to

24:30 Speaker 5: your point where we're explaining ourselves over and over again,

24:34 Speaker 5: and we're trying to explain Listen, you know it's this

24:37 Speaker 5: is not a punishment, this is just time. This is

24:40 Speaker 5: it's not in the cards today. Uh. And he goes

24:43 Speaker 5: off the chain like that.

24:44 Speaker 8: And and this is not just him saying I don't

24:47 Speaker 8: like this. This is him screaming.

24:50 Speaker 5: This is him yelling, throwing, kicking stuff, kicking a dog sometimes.

24:54 Speaker 5: I mean, that's that's extreme. But you know our dogs

24:58 Speaker 5: are small. I mean they can get her easily. Sure,

25:01 Speaker 5: it's a lot of big behavior issues from a little

25:04 Speaker 5: kid who's not even like fifty inches tall yet at

25:07 Speaker 5: nine years old. So he's a little guy. And I

25:09 Speaker 5: know he's probably had some issues with that too. He

25:11 Speaker 5: doesn't like being the little guy, and I understand that.

25:15 Speaker 5: But I also told him, listen, when you get into football,

25:17 Speaker 5: nobody's gonna touch you. You're so fast, you just go ahead,

25:20 Speaker 5: just go around them that they're not gonna be able

25:22 Speaker 5: to mess with you. You're so tiny, you just go

25:24 Speaker 5: underneath their legs. Yeah, it's it's it's cool. So it's

25:29 Speaker 5: but when when I say corporle punchs, but I'm not

25:31 Speaker 5: talking about taking them out to the back and hanging

25:33 Speaker 5: him or anything like that. That's not what I'm talking

25:35 Speaker 5: about talking about.

25:36 Speaker 6: That would be murdered.

25:38 Speaker 5: Yeah, and well some people can take that to another

25:42 Speaker 5: degree that that's saying I'm not talking about that. I'm

25:46 Speaker 5: not even talking about taking a spatchelor or wooden spoon

25:49 Speaker 5: and spanking. I'm not talking about that is a tap

25:52 Speaker 5: to the butt. It just you need to stop. Yeah, Okay,

25:56 Speaker 5: we tried the talking, we tried the time out. They

26:00 Speaker 5: ain't working.

26:01 Speaker 8: You will get a spanking.

26:03 Speaker 5: And I'm sorry for people and parents that feel that way.

26:06 Speaker 5: But when it comes to difficult times, come to difficult decisions,

26:11 Speaker 5: and that's a difficult decision. My wife doesn't agree with that,

26:14 Speaker 5: and and really bless her. I respect her opinion on that. Yeah,

26:17 Speaker 5: I respect her opinion on not spanking, but there's times

26:20 Speaker 5: that she's had to because all else has failed.

26:25 Speaker 7: Has has I gotten better as he's gotten older, or

26:28 Speaker 7: or has it gotten worse or what's what's kind of

26:31 Speaker 7: the situation there? You said he's nine years old, now.

26:34 Speaker 5: Yeah, so when we got the one, he was two.

26:37 Speaker 5: She already had some some issues with the people that

26:41 Speaker 5: he was staying with. We're trying to get that out,

26:44 Speaker 5: but it's been you know, the memories on him. Are

26:47 Speaker 5: you sput this way when when when we first got him,

26:50 Speaker 5: I was putting on my belt to go to work

26:52 Speaker 5: on my jeans. Dad, you don't hit me?

26:56 Speaker 8: Oh, so we know it was abuse going on, Yeah,

27:01 Speaker 8: you know, and it's.

27:03 Speaker 5: Like, no, I'll never do that. No, No, I gotten

27:06 Speaker 5: hit with the belt before too. It's like, we're not

27:09 Speaker 5: doing this. There's other ways to handle this. I'm not

27:12 Speaker 5: doing this. And it's never come to that. It's never

27:15 Speaker 5: come to the wooden spoon or anything like that. So

27:17 Speaker 5: that's that's at least a good thing. Yeah, But from

27:23 Speaker 5: the time we got into now it's actually it's gotten

27:26 Speaker 5: a little bit worse because he just has that much

27:29 Speaker 5: energy in him to the point where he can't tone down,

27:34 Speaker 5: he can't down shift. It's it's, uh, how Jacob Fatu

27:39 Speaker 5: put it now, all gas, no brakes, that's him, that's him. Wow.

27:46 Speaker 7: No, that's that's challenging. Yeah, that is that is very challenging.

27:52 Speaker 7: Are you and Alyssa generally on the same page in

27:55 Speaker 7: terms of how to deal with him? I mean, I

27:56 Speaker 7: know that with the spanking you've got some disagreement there,

27:58 Speaker 7: but what what about? What about? More just more broadly,

28:02 Speaker 7: are you or do you? Have to have a lot

28:05 Speaker 7: of discussions about how do we handle this?

28:08 Speaker 5: A lot of its discussions because I don't understand. See,

28:11 Speaker 5: my way of being brought up was you do not

28:14 Speaker 5: disrespect your parents one bit, and if you do, there

28:17 Speaker 5: is consequences, and some of those consequences can be severe.

28:21 Speaker 7: Yeah.

28:21 Speaker 5: Now with that being said, I understand that this is

28:24 Speaker 5: a new day and age where we have to be

28:28 Speaker 5: we have to adjust to not offend anybody and stuff

28:33 Speaker 5: like that. So so the discussion is I'm grateful to

28:38 Speaker 5: have a wife that is actually in the field that

28:40 Speaker 5: she's in, so we do have discussions. She's trying to

28:43 Speaker 5: explain to me why this is going on and that's

28:45 Speaker 5: going on. So in a way, I'm actually being taught

28:49 Speaker 5: by my wife in regards to this type of behavior management. Well,

28:56 Speaker 5: also the fact my wife does deal with this eight

28:59 Speaker 5: hours a day and she comes home and she has

29:01 Speaker 5: to do it again. She's already exhausted. So sometimes it

29:04 Speaker 5: doesn't get followed that much. So the argument doesn't comes.

29:08 Speaker 5: And I wouldn't say argument, I would just say, listen,

29:10 Speaker 5: you want me to follow the plan? How about you

29:13 Speaker 5: follow it too, because right now you're telling me to

29:17 Speaker 5: do one thing and do to do another thing. And

29:20 Speaker 5: I understand you're frustrated.

29:22 Speaker 8: We're all frustrated.

29:23 Speaker 5: And I understand you're tired and you just have a

29:25 Speaker 5: long day and you don't want to deal with it anymore.

29:27 Speaker 5: But this is our job, right, this is our unpaid job.

29:31 Speaker 5: We need to go ahead and do this. Yeah, and

29:34 Speaker 5: you're talking about me being on the same page, which

29:36 Speaker 5: she constantly says, I'm not talking about me being on

29:39 Speaker 5: the same page. You gotta be on the same page too.

29:41 Speaker 5: It is a constant struggle, man, It's a constant struggle.

29:44 Speaker 5: And yes, there's times I'm stepping in my car and

29:48 Speaker 5: I'm thinking I can't do this because if I do,

29:51 Speaker 5: I'm gonna do something that's way wrong. I need to go.

29:54 Speaker 5: I need to have a drink. And I'm not talking

29:58 Speaker 5: about club soda.

29:59 Speaker 7: I'm talking about Yeah.

30:01 Speaker 5: So it's a struggle though.

30:04 Speaker 7: Yeah, Yeah, I've seen you know obviously over the years,

30:08 Speaker 7: I've seen some videos that you've posted where you've talked about, uh,

30:13 Speaker 7: you know how how challenging it all is. And uh no,

30:16 Speaker 7: I feel for you, man, Like I said, as someone

30:18 Speaker 7: who's not not a parent. I can only imagine how

30:23 Speaker 7: challenging that is. And you know, it's one of the reasons.

30:25 Speaker 7: There's a there's a number of different reasons why I

30:27 Speaker 7: was never interested in having children of my own, and

30:30 Speaker 7: and one of them is how do you deal with

30:31 Speaker 7: challenges like that?

30:33 Speaker 5: You know?

30:33 Speaker 7: Another one is I don't know how anybody affords it.

30:35 Speaker 7: There's all kinds of reasons why I am happily childless.

30:40 Speaker 7: But uh, but but no, so I feel for you.

30:45 Speaker 5: Yeah, And we've wanted to have kids, and I've come

30:48 Speaker 5: to question my own insanity over the years, like why

30:52 Speaker 5: did I want this? But I also understand that, listen,

30:56 Speaker 5: he does have something developmental issues, he does have some

31:00 Speaker 5: behavioral issues, And you know, that's kind of the thing nowadays,

31:04 Speaker 5: like isn't it like now that we're more aware of

31:07 Speaker 5: these mental challenges, that we're starting to see it and

31:11 Speaker 5: starting to The one thing I don't get is pilling

31:16 Speaker 5: up my kid.

31:16 Speaker 8: Do you realize he's already on six medications.

31:20 Speaker 5: He's on the same type of medications, not the same type,

31:24 Speaker 5: the same number of medications that I am on. And

31:27 Speaker 5: I have diabetes in the high blood pressure. Yeah, and

31:29 Speaker 5: I'm on those. I combined the two and basically that

31:35 Speaker 5: the same the same number of medications is what my

31:38 Speaker 5: mom used to take.

31:39 Speaker 8: And that scares the frightened crop.

31:41 Speaker 5: Out of me.

31:42 Speaker 7: Really does has has he always? Has? He always been

31:46 Speaker 7: on that many or is that more of a recent development.

31:49 Speaker 5: So he started off on the one where he takes

31:51 Speaker 5: in the morning and that usually got him through the day.

31:55 Speaker 5: And this is going through the testing experimental five year old,

31:58 Speaker 5: six year old stage when he's just started school. Then

32:01 Speaker 5: they said, no, maybe he needs a midday bumper, you know,

32:07 Speaker 5: so they give him another one there for the midday.

32:10 Speaker 5: Then we find out he's not going to sleep, so

32:13 Speaker 5: they have a quantity that's on there and we take

32:17 Speaker 5: that with melatonin and it kind of, you know, it

32:19 Speaker 5: kind of mellows him out, but not really. He's becoming

32:22 Speaker 5: immune to it. And there's a couple of other ones

32:24 Speaker 5: there that I don't really understand. My wife would understand

32:27 Speaker 5: more than that. But it's all been by doctors that

32:31 Speaker 5: have seen him, that know his diagnosis, that knows what

32:34 Speaker 5: he's going through. And we're telling him that this is working,

32:39 Speaker 5: this is not working. Stuff like that, I mean, and

32:42 Speaker 5: don't get me wrong. He's not like this twenty four seven.

32:44 Speaker 5: Like right now, he's in his room. He's doing quiet time,

32:48 Speaker 5: which is part of his routine. That's one thing with

32:51 Speaker 5: kids with ADHD is we have to have a routine

32:54 Speaker 5: and make sure he sticks with it. Yeah, so he

32:57 Speaker 5: had breakfast right before we got on the show, and

33:01 Speaker 5: once he's done with his breakfast, he goes in this room.

33:03 Speaker 8: Now, you can have TV on some type of mild thing.

33:05 Speaker 8: That's the other thing.

33:06 Speaker 5: We got to make sure what he wants watches is

33:09 Speaker 5: something crazy. I mean, he's already addicted to miles around

33:12 Speaker 5: Spider Man for definite reasons, but he is addicted to

33:17 Speaker 5: Spider Man. Loves spider I think he's been Spider Man

33:20 Speaker 5: three times during Halloween and I'm seven years so almost

33:26 Speaker 5: half the time he's Spider Man. Wow. So I'm trying

33:30 Speaker 5: to find out who is Was there any big guy

33:33 Speaker 5: in the Marvel universe that actually? I mean, I guess

33:35 Speaker 5: I could be the Hulk. You know my body. I mean,

33:38 Speaker 5: I'd be the out of shape Hulk. Beat him. Uh.

33:44 Speaker 5: We're turning into a Marvel family really, And of course

33:47 Speaker 5: we're Disney fans, so that kind of goes along with it.

33:52 Speaker 8: But what was I talking about?

33:54 Speaker 5: Medication? Yeah, I'm going all over the place. Man, I'm sorry.

33:59 Speaker 7: That's quite all right, that's quite all right. We haven't

34:01 Speaker 7: talked for a while, so this is uh, this is good.

34:03 Speaker 7: You're allowed to go all over the place. But so

34:06 Speaker 7: I'm curious, So what what do you do? And by

34:08 Speaker 7: the way, so other people who might be in a

34:09 Speaker 7: situation similar to you, who have kids that are challenging,

34:13 Speaker 7: might be really interested in this too. What do you

34:16 Speaker 7: do for you You know, we talked about you know

34:19 Speaker 7: his you know, the different meds and everything, and how

34:22 Speaker 7: you try to manage him. But but what what do

34:24 Speaker 7: you do for yourself to give yourself some relief, to

34:26 Speaker 7: make yourself feel better, to cope with it all? What

34:29 Speaker 7: are some I mean, do you have some I assume

34:31 Speaker 7: over the years you've developed and probably ALYSSA too, You've

34:33 Speaker 7: you've probably both developed some some coping mechanisms to to

34:37 Speaker 7: kind of help you with this, uh, this challenge of

34:40 Speaker 7: raising your child. So I'm curious about some of that.

34:45 Speaker 5: Well, a lot of it is trying to take yourself

34:49 Speaker 5: out of the situation. So obviously, did come to a

34:52 Speaker 5: point where you have to deal with the situation, so

34:54 Speaker 5: that you know that that's understandable, that we all know

34:57 Speaker 5: that the dealing of the situation. But once you've dealt

34:59 Speaker 5: with a situation and it is still ongoing, like when

35:04 Speaker 5: we put him in time out, we put him in

35:06 Speaker 5: time out into an area where there's doors, there's class closets,

35:12 Speaker 5: wooden closets, and we hear him against the door. I

35:15 Speaker 5: want out, I want out, I want out. Like honestly,

35:20 Speaker 5: if people, if we lived in an apartment complex, we'd

35:22 Speaker 5: have the cops called twenty four to seven because he

35:24 Speaker 5: wants out. They go, oh my god, he wants out.

35:27 Speaker 5: He's being trappist.

35:28 Speaker 8: He's not being trapped.

35:29 Speaker 5: He's in time out, right, So a lot of times,

35:33 Speaker 5: you know, the best way is to ignore the situation

35:37 Speaker 5: because he's trying to get attention. Yeah, and that comes

35:40 Speaker 5: into other factors too, with going to bed, and again

35:45 Speaker 5: this brings me back to the point, I don't understand

35:47 Speaker 5: how my parents did it. Because we actually have a

35:49 Speaker 5: camera in his room so we can monitor what he's doing. Uh,

35:53 Speaker 5: we're obsessed with the camera, unfortunately, I mean, but that's uh,

35:57 Speaker 5: but that's the way we can kind of see what

35:58 Speaker 5: he's doing. And he too, on his blanket, he choos

36:01 Speaker 5: on his pillow case. He goes in and picks his

36:03 Speaker 5: hair and twists his hair. If you took a look

36:05 Speaker 5: a close.

36:06 Speaker 8: Look at him, maybe even a far close, a far.

36:08 Speaker 5: Look at him, you see that there's like areas of

36:12 Speaker 5: spots of hair that are missing because he keeps picking

36:15 Speaker 5: his hair. He cracks him out, He cracks his knuckles,

36:18 Speaker 5: choose his fingernails. And I know it's an anxiety thing.

36:21 Speaker 5: You know that I've confirmed with my wife, like yeah, this,

36:24 Speaker 5: this is this is an anxiety thing. So he's just

36:27 Speaker 5: doing it because he's nervous or anxious or just you know,

36:32 Speaker 5: he doesn't want to be in that situation or he's not,

36:34 Speaker 5: but he does not. And this is the problem though,

36:36 Speaker 5: which right to break him out of him? He does

36:38 Speaker 5: not tell us what's going on, what's wrong, nothing, what's

36:42 Speaker 5: w and the problem And I think the thing is

36:45 Speaker 5: too when I get frustrated, I don't want to talk

36:48 Speaker 5: about it, I do the same thing. So I think

36:50 Speaker 5: I'm fearful that he's actually taken that from me, and

36:54 Speaker 5: that that that stinks, and I'm sorry that I brought

36:56 Speaker 5: that upon him. But that's my ment. That's my mental

37:00 Speaker 5: languish too, is I just don't want to talk about

37:01 Speaker 5: because if I talk about, it's going to be any

37:03 Speaker 5: more mad.

37:04 Speaker 8: And I don't want to yell my wife. I don't

37:06 Speaker 8: want to yell and scream and.

37:08 Speaker 5: Go into it.

37:09 Speaker 8: It's like, I know what the problem is. There's nothing

37:11 Speaker 8: you can do.

37:11 Speaker 2: I know.

37:12 Speaker 5: And my wife, I love her so much, she is

37:15 Speaker 5: so nice and understanding. She wants to help in any

37:18 Speaker 5: way possible. I just tell her the truth is this point,

37:23 Speaker 5: this problem problem X. So whatever the problem is at

37:26 Speaker 5: that time.

37:27 Speaker 8: There's nothing you can do to help me.

37:29 Speaker 5: There's nothing you can do. And I appreciate your help,

37:31 Speaker 5: but there's nothing. And of course she feels emotional with

37:35 Speaker 5: that because she feels helpless, and it's like, I'm sorry,

37:37 Speaker 5: there's nothing you didn't do anything wrong. This is something

37:40 Speaker 5: I have to deal with. And unfortunately, I think that's

37:43 Speaker 5: what my son picks it up from. But when we

37:46 Speaker 5: go ahead and put him in time out, and we

37:48 Speaker 5: tried to go ahead and calm him down when he

37:52 Speaker 5: is told no, or he's told something he doesn't like,

37:56 Speaker 5: let's put it that way. Just over all that we

37:58 Speaker 5: need to go ahead, he's he's going to explode. He's

38:01 Speaker 5: gonna blow up, and he's going to go ahead and

38:03 Speaker 5: say things and do things, and that obviously isn't what

38:07 Speaker 5: we are teaching him. We don't want him to do that. Yeah,

38:12 Speaker 5: So when he goes into his timeout area, he starts

38:14 Speaker 5: banging on the walls and screaming. We immediately either we

38:20 Speaker 5: leave this, leave the area. We still have a camera

38:22 Speaker 5: in the living room too, so we can see so

38:24 Speaker 5: that way we know he's not harming himself, but we

38:27 Speaker 5: leave the area just so he knows that.

38:29 Speaker 8: Hey, nobody's listening to me.

38:32 Speaker 5: And usually that works because usually it's all for attention.

38:36 Speaker 7: Right, and that makes sense.

38:40 Speaker 5: Yeah, that works. Now we feel like, well, we should

38:43 Speaker 5: be out there attending to him, but we we're kind

38:45 Speaker 5: of We kind of are because we do have a

38:47 Speaker 5: camera that's in the living room that does watch over

38:50 Speaker 5: the whole house plus his timeout area, so we see

38:53 Speaker 5: what he's doing and if if there is anything that

38:56 Speaker 5: is harmful to him. We're not too far away. We

38:59 Speaker 5: don't in a big house. We're not too far away.

39:02 Speaker 5: So we'll go out there and take care of the

39:04 Speaker 5: situation if it warn't that. But it doesn't, it hasn't,

39:08 Speaker 5: thank god. It hasn't gotten to that far yet.

39:10 Speaker 7: Yeah, Jenny had something.

39:13 Speaker 6: I'm assuming that he probably has a diagnosis of CPTSD

39:17 Speaker 6: as well with the abuse.

39:20 Speaker 5: Oh he doesn't. I don't know if you just have

39:22 Speaker 5: never been tested for it, but maybe that's something that

39:25 Speaker 5: we could test him on. But no, he's never been

39:28 Speaker 5: tested for that.

39:29 Speaker 6: I feel for him a great deal and something I

39:33 Speaker 6: don't talk about very often as I was raised in

39:35 Speaker 6: significant abuse and I have CPTSD and it actually causes

39:41 Speaker 6: kiddos to live in fight flight fear every moment of

39:45 Speaker 6: every day. And it's literally a brain injury that causes

39:50 Speaker 6: the brain to develop differently than it would in a

39:53 Speaker 6: child who hasn't been abused. So I can only imagine

39:58 Speaker 6: when he's pent up like that, when he's when that's

40:01 Speaker 6: coming out all that, where it's coming from. And how

40:05 Speaker 6: I commend you in that this is a very difficult

40:08 Speaker 6: thing to try and overcome. And thankfully he's at a

40:12 Speaker 6: young age that you're doing this. And yes, of course

40:17 Speaker 6: I know he has a therapist. I know you guys

40:19 Speaker 6: do all of that, And how hard that is as

40:22 Speaker 6: a parent to look at a child and realize, you know,

40:25 Speaker 6: this is coming from an honest and genuine place. He

40:28 Speaker 6: didn't ask for what happened, But now he's stuck in

40:32 Speaker 6: that fight flight fear to try and help him overcome that.

40:38 Speaker 6: I mean, I know it's years. I know that you

40:40 Speaker 6: guys have. It's been a long trip to get to

40:43 Speaker 6: this point, and it's amazing what you've been able to

40:46 Speaker 6: accomplish with him and to be able to help him

40:50 Speaker 6: through those difficult times when you know that switch is

40:54 Speaker 6: not shutting off, it's it's just it's stuck and he

40:58 Speaker 6: has nowhere to put that energy or or where to

41:01 Speaker 6: where to go with it, and it's just it's it's

41:04 Speaker 6: coming out and in the ways that it is that

41:06 Speaker 6: are unfortunately sometimes destructive, but you're able to help minimize

41:13 Speaker 6: and keep him safe at the same time.

41:17 Speaker 5: The one the one thing that we always do and

41:19 Speaker 5: and thank you, Jenny, but the one thing that we

41:22 Speaker 5: we always try to do, regardless of the situations. We're

41:25 Speaker 5: always there to say, listen, we're here to help. We

41:27 Speaker 5: want you to listen. We are ready to listen to

41:30 Speaker 5: you when you need something, you need help, you tell us.

41:35 Speaker 8: What's going on.

41:36 Speaker 5: It's even come to the point now where we're kind

41:38 Speaker 5: of putting we're kind of putting our foot down when

41:42 Speaker 5: he is visible, visibly upset, crossing his arms, grunting man,

41:50 Speaker 5: and we're telling what's wrong, nothing, No, we're we We

41:54 Speaker 5: used to take that and it's like, well, listen, we're

41:56 Speaker 5: here to talk if you want to talk, but he

41:58 Speaker 5: never did. So now it's to the point where, no,

42:02 Speaker 5: you're going to tell us what's wrong because we need

42:05 Speaker 5: to know what's wrong so we can help you. You

42:08 Speaker 5: need help, even though you want to be strong and stubborn,

42:15 Speaker 5: but you need help. Daddy needs help, mommy needs help.

42:18 Speaker 5: We all need help. So there's no shame in asking

42:22 Speaker 5: for help, right, Yes, such one. I appreciate that, thank you,

42:32 Speaker 5: but sometimes that doesn't work. More often than it has,

42:36 Speaker 5: he has started to come around to understand that I

42:41 Speaker 5: don't know or nothing is not an appropriate answer anymore,

42:45 Speaker 5: because you do know, you do know, and you you

42:49 Speaker 5: need to tell us what you're feeling. And he needs

42:52 Speaker 5: to learn how to express his feelings, and we're trying

42:55 Speaker 5: to teach him that it's okay to have feelings. Dude,

42:59 Speaker 5: I underst saying you're in school and you got peer pressure,

43:02 Speaker 5: and you got people that just act like animals. We know,

43:05 Speaker 5: we've heard, we've talked to teachers and you and you

43:09 Speaker 5: have this just this instinct on well, if they're doing

43:14 Speaker 5: it and they're getting all this attention, I'm gonna do it.

43:17 Speaker 5: He's taking it. But it's also that.

43:19 Speaker 6: Front, right, it's also that front right where he's that's

43:23 Speaker 6: his defense mechanism fight fight. Fear is kicking in, and

43:27 Speaker 6: that defense mechanism comes up and goes, oh, I'm gonna

43:29 Speaker 6: shield myself. Nobody's gonna hurt me because I'm not letting

43:32 Speaker 6: him get close enough.

43:34 Speaker 5: You know.

43:34 Speaker 6: It's you know, he doesn't know that he's doing that,

43:37 Speaker 6: but that's his own mind's way of trying to self protect,

43:40 Speaker 6: to try and anticipate that something might hurt me, so

43:43 Speaker 6: this might go wrong, and you're trying to help him

43:46 Speaker 6: overcome what has become a natural reaction for him, for

43:51 Speaker 6: his mind or his body, because that's safety, that's protect

43:55 Speaker 6: self protection.

43:56 Speaker 5: Right.

43:57 Speaker 6: It's not the way you want him to go, but

43:58 Speaker 6: you're trying to teach him. And that's why I have

44:00 Speaker 6: a lot of hope for him, and that he is young,

44:06 Speaker 6: and you guys have been able to You're been working

44:09 Speaker 6: these many years, and he has so many more years

44:11 Speaker 6: to come with having two parents that are really putting

44:15 Speaker 6: in the work and willing to have that difficult conversation. Right,

44:19 Speaker 6: That's the hardest thing is to say it's okay to

44:21 Speaker 6: say you don't feel okay, It's okay to tell me

44:24 Speaker 6: something's not right, it's okay to tell me a negative thing.

44:28 Speaker 6: And that's like such a huge thing to give them

44:31 Speaker 6: permission to share that most vulnerable thing, that that thing

44:36 Speaker 6: that's making them terrified. Essentially, like, I don't want you

44:39 Speaker 6: to know this because I believe you're gonna get angry

44:41 Speaker 6: with me, but you're not. You're you're trying to tell him. Nah, dude,

44:45 Speaker 6: you can tell me anything, and I'm going to be

44:47 Speaker 6: right here to hear it. I'm not gonna get mad

44:49 Speaker 6: at you. I'm gonna help you deal with it. But

44:51 Speaker 6: that that isn't that the lesson you're working on right

44:54 Speaker 6: now as he matures to learn that it's okay and

44:57 Speaker 6: it's safe to come to mom and dad say this

45:01 Speaker 6: is bothering me, you know right, you know.

45:06 Speaker 5: We're here behind closed doors. You don't have to be

45:09 Speaker 5: tough to in front of your friends. Because there was

45:13 Speaker 5: even he had a test, a big test to graduate

45:16 Speaker 5: third grade.

45:17 Speaker 8: Yes, he's a year behind, but that was a choice that.

45:20 Speaker 5: We made because he wasn't grasping everything was so far behind.

45:24 Speaker 5: But he had a big test to graduate third grade,

45:28 Speaker 5: and he was I saw Hughes asly nervous. Mom already

45:32 Speaker 5: had to talk with him while I was getting ready

45:34 Speaker 5: for work. I didn't know that, so I had to

45:36 Speaker 5: talk with him in the car as I was dropping

45:37 Speaker 5: him off to school that I could hear a say, yeah, Mom,

45:40 Speaker 5: he already told me. He said, all right, well, listen,

45:42 Speaker 5: anything that's happened around your kid, around school, ignore these

45:47 Speaker 5: people that are trying to make jokes. Don't focus on

45:50 Speaker 5: anything but that you answered the question. Don't guess because

45:53 Speaker 5: he has a tendency just to guess and everything.

45:56 Speaker 7: Yeah.

45:57 Speaker 5: So, but I knew he was nervous, and you know,

46:00 Speaker 5: he was influenced later that day to say that be

46:03 Speaker 5: calling somebody the B word, which we don't use in

46:06 Speaker 5: the house. And uh, it's.

46:15 Speaker 6: That these kids are exposed to. It's way different than

46:18 Speaker 6: what we were kids.

46:19 Speaker 5: Way yeah, yeah, it's it's it's we're trying to teach

46:26 Speaker 5: him that it's it's okay. And by the way, Mike Gonzalez.

46:28 Speaker 8: Thank you very much for them for that.

46:30 Speaker 5: Uh for acknowledging me with that. Oh yeah, Isaac, Isaac,

46:34 Speaker 5: wait till after my segment to do some promotion.

46:39 Speaker 7: We should we should read Uh we haven't heard from

46:41 Speaker 7: Gonzo in a long time. By the way, I want

46:43 Speaker 7: to read this comment our our friend dot Gonzo. He says,

46:47 Speaker 7: courageous topic matter. I appreciate your transparency, Charles, because nobody

46:51 Speaker 7: has the guts to talk about being a father in

46:53 Speaker 7: the struggles. It comes with the fear of judgment. But

46:56 Speaker 7: it's good to hear.

46:57 Speaker 6: So yeah, said miss YouTube absolutely well said I'm a

47:01 Speaker 6: daddy's girl. I always raised by my dad.

47:05 Speaker 5: But I'll be honest with you, it's not a fear

47:07 Speaker 5: of judgment or what the public would view me. As

47:13 Speaker 5: you but you both know this, I really could care

47:16 Speaker 5: less of any outside criticism. If I'm not breaking the law,

47:22 Speaker 5: then I don't think you should have to criticize me

47:25 Speaker 5: or anything like that.

47:26 Speaker 8: I mean, if you want to judgement judgment, that's fine.

47:29 Speaker 5: You can take your judgment and bring it to your

47:32 Speaker 5: own court, because that's all it's going to get any

47:34 Speaker 5: any validation to me, it's not going to have any

47:38 Speaker 5: effect on my life. You know, I feel what I'm

47:41 Speaker 5: doing is right. I feel what I'm doing is improvement.

47:45 Speaker 5: And you know, I'm not perfect, and neither is any

47:48 Speaker 5: parent out there. Every parent thinks that there's a rule

47:51 Speaker 5: book that you can just go to on any normal situations,

47:55 Speaker 5: saying acting crazy because he's told no, we need to

48:00 Speaker 5: if ABC and the Okay, Hi, honey, go ahead and

48:04 Speaker 5: get the juice. No, it's it's there's no rule book

48:10 Speaker 5: into this. Nobody's perfect. And I'm gonna say the same thing.

48:13 Speaker 5: As egotistical as I am, I'm not perfect, and I'm

48:17 Speaker 5: trying to learn everything I can to try to be better,

48:20 Speaker 5: not only for my son, but for myself as well.

48:23 Speaker 5: Tried to learn to take more because honestly, I don't

48:29 Speaker 5: want to be this dad that just goes away for

48:31 Speaker 5: ice cream and never comes back. Yeah, and I'm afraid

48:33 Speaker 5: that one of these days that I go out for

48:35 Speaker 5: a drink, I may never come back. And that's my fear.

48:40 Speaker 5: But I don't want to do that. I don't want

48:42 Speaker 5: to do that, and I want to have a way

48:44 Speaker 5: of you know what, maybe I don't go out, but

48:47 Speaker 5: there's a way that I can call myself to make

48:50 Speaker 5: and do a better decision than just leaving it up

48:54 Speaker 5: to mom.

48:55 Speaker 7: Right, yeah, well, you know again as as someone who

49:01 Speaker 7: does not have children, I I uh, you know, I

49:03 Speaker 7: feel for you and I respect how you're you're able to.

49:06 Speaker 5: Uh, we can spy him up that you guys can

49:09 Speaker 5: watch him over the summer if you while. I mean,

49:10 Speaker 5: that's fine, that's.

49:12 Speaker 4: You know, that's okay.

49:13 Speaker 7: I think he'd probably uh you know, well actually he

49:17 Speaker 7: might like New Hampshire in the summer. But no, that's okay.

49:20 Speaker 7: We don't think my.

49:21 Speaker 6: Intro back into kiddos is going to be a smaller

49:23 Speaker 6: sized one eventually, not not not yet, but maybe a

49:28 Speaker 6: nana in my future.

49:29 Speaker 5: I remember, he's a little bit he's a little bit

49:31 Speaker 5: bigger than your cat. I mean not that much bigger.

49:33 Speaker 5: So maybe he came like a cat.

49:36 Speaker 7: He could probably bunk with DJ Reckless, right, you know,

49:39 Speaker 7: there we go. I remember years ago, we were we

49:42 Speaker 7: were gonna have easy g move in with us and

49:44 Speaker 7: bunk with Reckless. Yeah, they were gonna have bunk beds.

49:47 Speaker 7: It was gonna be a lot of fun. But it

49:48 Speaker 7: never never never happened. Yeah yeah, well, you know, sometimes uh,

49:59 Speaker 7: sometimes he's don't work out by the way, Charles. So

50:01 Speaker 7: we only have a little bit of time left before

50:03 Speaker 7: we get to the top of the hour. But how

50:05 Speaker 7: are you How are you enjoying Raw on Netflix?

50:10 Speaker 5: Well, when it actually works, it's fine. I'm loving the

50:14 Speaker 5: I'm loving the buffering and the delays that issue.

50:18 Speaker 7: Yeah, you've had trouble with the Well maybe it's your

50:21 Speaker 7: service left.

50:23 Speaker 5: Yeah, we left though. Even though I have a gig

50:27 Speaker 5: gig bit processor, I still have problems getting Netflix. Oh

50:31 Speaker 5: no kidding, it could be. It could be the road Coop.

50:35 Speaker 5: I'll be honest. We don't have the high tech rod

50:37 Speaker 5: coup or Apple TV or anything like that.

50:39 Speaker 6: Maybe that's what it is our internet, So now we're

50:42 Speaker 6: not having any.

50:43 Speaker 5: Leg there you go. But no, I do. I am

50:47 Speaker 5: liking Raw. I mean, I understand this. It's gonna get Curtis.

50:50 Speaker 5: All the haters are gonna hate no matter what. But

50:52 Speaker 5: I actually do enjoy the storyline. I'm very sad to

50:55 Speaker 5: see brone strum and leave again. I know there was

50:57 Speaker 5: no storyline there, but I always like when he comes

51:00 Speaker 5: into the ring and kicks people's you know, bottoms and

51:03 Speaker 5: son like I feel such like at let go.

51:10 Speaker 7: Yeah, it just happened last night. A whole bunch of

51:14 Speaker 7: NXT people are gone, Oh my god. It happens every

51:17 Speaker 7: year after WrestleMania. They go through and they release a

51:20 Speaker 7: bunch of people and you know, make room for new people.

51:23 Speaker 3: Yeah.

51:24 Speaker 6: No, I'm sad.

51:26 Speaker 5: It's evolution. It's an evolution. Bron didn't really have a storyline.

51:32 Speaker 5: He just came in there to kick a couple of

51:34 Speaker 5: people around and that's now. Yeah, they do, but they

51:40 Speaker 5: had no creative direction for him, and that's the thing.

51:44 Speaker 5: He hasn't had creative direction since the wyots.

51:47 Speaker 7: Yeah. I do feel like they kind of they've kind

51:49 Speaker 7: of done everything they could with him. He'll probably end

51:51 Speaker 7: up in a w and he'll have a fresh go

51:55 Speaker 7: to paint and.

51:55 Speaker 8: You know, and then come back. It's just like crusive.

51:59 Speaker 7: Yeah yeah, but did you want I assume you watched WrestleMania.

52:06 Speaker 5: Of course, I actually was was live with the Josh

52:10 Speaker 5: Zodiac podcast and they streamed. We were streaming it live

52:14 Speaker 5: as it was going on, obviously not video but audio only. Yeah,

52:19 Speaker 5: but yeah, yeah, we were calling shots. We predicted night

52:23 Speaker 5: one there was gonna be so much interference, and there

52:25 Speaker 5: end up being zero interference. So it's like we felt

52:28 Speaker 5: like absolute idiots. We did. I did call Paul Haman

52:34 Speaker 5: his turn. I called it right down the middle. I

52:38 Speaker 5: think the short description I put on my Facebook when

52:41 Speaker 5: I was predicting, when I was predicting the night one

52:45 Speaker 5: was Paul Hayman is now in between two his he's

52:48 Speaker 5: a best friend, he's a wise man. Who does he

52:51 Speaker 5: you know? Who does he do? Over? Yes? And he

52:57 Speaker 5: ends up being a.

53:00 Speaker 6: I didn't see that. I did not see that coming

53:03 Speaker 6: at I saw it.

53:04 Speaker 5: I saw it.

53:08 Speaker 6: I did not see him a set.

53:11 Speaker 5: Look at my look at my Facebook and the crime stamp.

53:15 Speaker 5: I called it right down the middle.

53:17 Speaker 6: They totally got me on that one. I had no

53:19 Speaker 6: I did not see that coming. And wow.

53:22 Speaker 7: Now also, and I'm sure Eric, I know well, I

53:25 Speaker 7: know Eric has talked to you about coming on Tough

53:28 Speaker 7: Bumps with Us, our new wrestling podcast that Eric and

53:30 Speaker 7: I are doing. But I'm really curious. The biggest disagreement

53:33 Speaker 7: that we had on episode one, and we're actually recording

53:36 Speaker 7: episode two today, but the biggest disagreement we had on

53:39 Speaker 7: episode one was the John Cena versus Cody Rhodes match.

53:42 Speaker 7: I actually liked it, but I feel like everyone and Jenny,

53:44 Speaker 7: you liked it, right, you didn't have any problem with it.

53:46 Speaker 7: From what I recall, you liked the match.

53:48 Speaker 5: I didn't have.

53:49 Speaker 6: Any problem with it. It just wasn't as energetic as others.

53:53 Speaker 7: Yeah, the the you know, the general consensus online seems

53:56 Speaker 7: to be a lot of people hated it. Eric didn't

53:58 Speaker 7: like it. I'm curious what you thought, Charles.

54:00 Speaker 6: I didn't.

54:02 Speaker 5: Yeah, here's here's what I said. And and you have

54:05 Speaker 5: to be objectively a person that knows the wrestling, the wrestlers,

54:11 Speaker 5: what match you're gonna do. Cody and John Cena are

54:14 Speaker 5: not top flight people that you're not going to see

54:17 Speaker 5: him do acrobatic moves all over the place. They are grinders,

54:21 Speaker 5: they are they are basically Matt junkies. They are gonna

54:26 Speaker 5: They're gonna go ahead and they're gonna grind these things out.

54:29 Speaker 8: You're not gonna see a bunch of high flying.

54:31 Speaker 5: So the matches that you see with the Lugidors is

54:34 Speaker 5: going to be well more entertaining than anything you're gonna

54:37 Speaker 5: see with with John and Cody. Sure, I felt that

54:41 Speaker 5: this I felt this match delivered on everything that these

54:44 Speaker 5: two wrestlers could do. And the Travis Scott, even though

54:49 Speaker 5: a lot of people were bummed at the Rock didn't

54:51 Speaker 5: make an appearance.

54:52 Speaker 8: I could have told you he ain't gonna be there, and.

54:55 Speaker 5: I'm okay with that, But the Travis Scott appearance and

54:58 Speaker 5: the way John Cena won was justified. He is a superhel.

55:04 Speaker 5: This is a John Ceny heel that should define healism,

55:08 Speaker 5: if that's even a word. Really, yes, this is a

55:13 Speaker 5: this is a John Ceny heel that I think it

55:16 Speaker 5: ended the way the character is portrayed, and that's by

55:21 Speaker 5: doing what he's doing. The Eddie Guerrero lied cheating and

55:24 Speaker 5: stealing anything he can get his hands on to win

55:28 Speaker 5: the match, and that's what he did.

55:29 Speaker 7: So it sounds like you're you're in line with what

55:31 Speaker 7: I said basically, so you enjoyed the match, and it

55:33 Speaker 7: sounds like you really enjoy John Cena working as a heel,

55:37 Speaker 7: and that to me, that was my argument to Eric.

55:39 Speaker 7: It was like, yeah, the match was slow. He's forty

55:41 Speaker 7: seven years old, but at his work rate was never

55:43 Speaker 7: that great to begin with. But we're seeing we're well,

55:47 Speaker 7: well no, it's it's true, but we're seeing we're seeing

55:50 Speaker 7: heel John Cena. And they had to let that breathe.

55:53 Speaker 7: The match had to be kind of slow to let

55:55 Speaker 7: that breathe and let us sort of take that in

55:57 Speaker 7: what heel John Cena is like and I'm really enjoying it.

56:02 Speaker 5: Yeah, I do like the character.

56:04 Speaker 8: And again, I think a lot of people like the character.

56:06 Speaker 5: That's why he's getting mixed reactions instead of just straight

56:09 Speaker 5: up booze. Yeah, regardless of maybe the booth could be

56:13 Speaker 5: filtered in because there's so much positivity.

56:16 Speaker 7: Going on with the character now, I don't know, because

56:18 Speaker 7: we find we finally got what we wanted. Yes, we finally, we.

56:23 Speaker 5: Finally when when when he kicked Cody right there in

56:27 Speaker 5: between in the private area, Uh, during that during that

56:31 Speaker 5: elimination chamber, Uh, there was such a pop. And I'm

56:35 Speaker 5: not talking about bad pop. It's like yeah, yeah, yeah,

56:40 Speaker 5: did you get him a booth? Yeah? I mean it

56:42 Speaker 5: was just it was great. I mean, and and I

56:45 Speaker 5: think that's why I truly believe back in creative and

56:50 Speaker 5: again this is just a theory. I truly believe they

56:54 Speaker 5: were going to come out with a whole new entrance,

56:57 Speaker 5: with a whole new gimmick, with a whole new dress,

56:59 Speaker 5: and just because that's what people wanted the No.

57:04 Speaker 7: Yeah, that was the other thing I liked at WrestleMania.

57:06 Speaker 7: I liked the minimalism of seeing his entrance with just

57:08 Speaker 7: you know, his name in white on a black background.

57:11 Speaker 7: I thought that was I thought that was perfectly done

57:14 Speaker 7: and uh and and really set the tone. I thought

57:17 Speaker 7: that was excellent.

57:20 Speaker 5: Yep, I'm liking everything they're doing.

57:22 Speaker 8: Really.

57:22 Speaker 5: I mean, there's not a whole lot that I'm not liking.

57:25 Speaker 5: I don't like the Mister America re themed.

57:31 Speaker 7: Oh, I like it.

57:33 Speaker 5: I like it.

57:34 Speaker 7: I think I.

57:38 Speaker 5: Love it.

57:39 Speaker 6: I like it.

57:39 Speaker 7: I think it's I think it's fun.

57:41 Speaker 6: It's totally fun. And I get my back.

57:44 Speaker 5: Yeah, the whole mister America thing, it's not No, it's

57:52 Speaker 5: not it is.

57:54 Speaker 6: It's his thank you character repackaged.

57:57 Speaker 7: Yeah, I think it's I think it's fun. I'my. I

57:59 Speaker 7: love Charles. Charles. We are right up against the top

58:03 Speaker 7: of the hour, so we're gonna have to move on

58:05 Speaker 7: in a moment. But this has been wonderful. We must

58:07 Speaker 7: do this more often. And I'm sure I'm going to

58:10 Speaker 7: see you on the Tough Bumps podcast too. I know

58:11 Speaker 7: you and Eric have been talking about that. But also,

58:15 Speaker 7: please give your show a plug.

58:18 Speaker 5: Yeah, so right now it is basically how do we say,

58:23 Speaker 5: it's whenever we go on, we go on. Usually it's

58:26 Speaker 5: Monday and Wednesdays that we have right now. That could change.

58:29 Speaker 5: But going to my Facebook, it's actually posted there on

58:32 Speaker 5: the comments Facebook dot com FoST as the Charles Richardson Show.

58:36 Speaker 5: That's my page. You can subscribe to my YouTube channel

58:38 Speaker 5: also titled The Charles Richardson Show, and our affiliate station,

58:45 Speaker 5: which is my own station for eighties and nineties dance

58:48 Speaker 5: music Power one Radio. We're also aired there live and

58:51 Speaker 5: that's on the Live three sixty five app as well.

58:53 Speaker 7: Outstanding outstanding, well, Charles, always wonderful to speak with you,

58:57 Speaker 7: my friend. Like I said, we must do this more often.

59:00 Speaker 7: And my best to everyone there, and I am sure

59:03 Speaker 7: we will talk to you soon. And by the way,

59:05 Speaker 7: thanks for being the guinea pig with us using WhatsApp.

59:08 Speaker 7: We've made radio history for the first time on Matt

59:10 Speaker 7: Connorton Unleashed, we have used WhatsApp for this purpose. Now

59:16 Speaker 7: that now that Skype is now that Skype is deceased,

59:20 Speaker 7: r I P Skype.

59:22 Speaker 8: Why do you guys call me a pig?

59:24 Speaker 5: I mean I'm already fat enough as it is. Yes, yeah, yeah, yes,

59:35 Speaker 5: I love you guys. You take care all.

59:37 Speaker 7: Right, you too, Charles take care bye bye, all right,

59:41 Speaker 7: very good, very good. Well, we're gonna take a quick break.

59:44 Speaker 7: We're going to show some love to our amazing sponsors

59:47 Speaker 7: and then coming right up when we come back. Able

59:49 Speaker 7: Blood they are in the building. I presume they are

59:52 Speaker 7: in the building. Outstanding. We love Able Blood, one of

59:54 Speaker 7: our favorite New England bands and